10k okay?

I've decided that the last time I felt REALLY good, and felt I LOOKED really good was when I was running consistently. I kinda fell away from it for a while, but thanks to the spring weather (which brings summer clothes...), new music on my ipod-shuffle, an EXCELLENT/FREE day-care at my gym, and the need and calming of "alone" time, I am excited about being an avid runner, again.

I'm what you might call a "anti-social" runner...When I run, the minute the headphones go on and I begin the journey, I tune out EVERYTHING!! Despite the fact that I am running, I feel calm, relaxed, and peaceful (and let's not deny the fact that I'm hoping to run (literally) my butt off!!). My goal is to run a marathon...Yes...I said it...it's official...A MARATHON!! There are two big marathons around here that I could participate in, and if all else fails, the distance from me to my sister's house is the approximate length of a marathon.

Right now I am running about 6 miles, five times a week, so basically an hour a day. I'm going to work at getting my speed faster, as well as incorporating longer runs into my routine. I'm excited to have a goal...I've been looking for something to be working on, and this just seems to fit for so many reasons.

My motto? "10k everyday!"


A Vacation with Me, Myself, and I

Since a very young age I have always been very self-reliant, motivated, and basically very independent. Perhaps this is due to the fact I was the eldest in my family, and my parents held extremely high expectations of me, coupled with the fact that we moved a lot growing up, which meant I never had a secure or constant group of close friends to "evolve" with, thereby, I became very comfortable with the concept of finding happiness and purpose, without a crowd of close friends.

Lately, I have been feeling very...what's the word...indifferent? I have a set of six friends, who over the past 3-8 years have become my touch-stones, my confidants, my sounding boards, my little circle of "sisters." But...have you ever just wanted to be alone? Over the past couple of months, I have felt the desire to not extend myself, to anyone outside my family. Is it because I became so comfortable with being independent when I was growing up that now I sometimes would rather not put forth the efforts of play-groups, outings, book clubs, phone calls? Does it mean I need change? Does it mean I am rude? Does it mean that I am being selfish?

Or...is it residual from past experiences, where I have given, and given, only to be hurt or betrayed later in the relationship? (okay...now I am getting too psychological, too emotional, and too introverted!)

Regardless, I have decided to call it a little vacation...a vacation of just me...me, myself, and I! I hope that it is just a phase...Maybe I just need to rejuvenate...Maybe I need a new hobby...Maybe I need to re-invent myself...Maybe I just need a really long nap...?! Or maybe, I should just enjoy my "vacation," not feel guilty, and hug, kiss, and spoil my kids and husband with all the love and time I am granting myself?!

Now THAT sounds like a FUN vacation!!


Joseph and Technicolor Poop

Well...The title really does say it all! I gave my lesson on Sunday, where it ended with Joseph saving his family from the famine....Transition to my home, where we move to the land of plenty...plenty of POOP that is.

Yes folks...It is potty-training time here, and it's not just in its literal sense.

My son is not quite catching on to the concept of going #2...and I lost track of how many cute "Thomas the Train" and "Spiderman" underwear were lost to large, smeared loads of "material" being left behind...no "pun" intended...well, maybe a little...

On one of these special occasions, after my son had told me to "go away," and had "the look" on his face (you all know "the look..." it's the one the precedes "the load..") I proceeded to explain the requisite "Remember...poop goes in the potty..." when I notice COLOR... It was a vivid, turquoise color, with cool green "marbled" swirls in it. It would almost be classified as a "pretty" color, except when you realize what you are looking at...which would be a pair of size 3 underwear FILLED with this color "swatch." (Note: Too many fruit snacks produce beautiful "technicolor" substances!)

Well...I must be a "crappy" mom, because I gave up! When the s*** hits the fan... (again, and again, and again...) there's only one thing to do...Make "Monkey Poop"

(also called No-Bake Cookies)
1/2 cup butter, melted
2 cups sugar
1/4 cup cocoa
1/2 cup mild
3 1/2 cups quick oats (3 cups of using regular oatmeal)
1 tsp vanilla

Boil butter, sugar, milk and cocoa for 3 minutes. Add oats and 1 tsp vanilla. Spoon onto wax paper. Let cool. (Gross looking, but highly addictive!)

With all feces being produced around here, you might think that I was working on a "poop-deck," and need to be wearing rubber-boots as my shoes of the day. But since I don't own a pair of rubber-boots (yes, yes...a pair of shoes I don't own...) I wore my stacked-heel Mary-janes...Comfortable, and a little fiesty, to combat my "fecal-offender!!

Thanks for letting me "unload."


The Theraputic Nature of Shoes

While doing some "window shopping" on a favorite web site, I noticed a "new" selection option for some of the styles...it read...

"Now Available in size Double-Zero"

What the crap?! Am I missing something here? Has the retail world really started utilizing, basically, a double-nothing sizing option? Don't they realize that the mass majority of us have not been in anything close to this since, probably, Jr. High? Do they not realize that on ALL clearance racks there are only 2's, zeros, and now, DOUBLE zeros left? Does this not mean that the bulk of their consumers are NOT these sizes, because they are ALWAYS the ones left over, season after season?

So...What would be the difference between an 8, and a double-8? (Am I being discriminated against?!) Do we need a size that now says, "Hey, you are skinny...REALLY skinny..." I know that there are those blessed folks out there that are saying, "Grass in always greener...I'm skinny, but I don't have boobs, etc.," and "We all have our issues we aren't happy with..," and I'm sure to an extent this is true. BUT, buying a padded bra or a boob-job is a little different than stuffing ample boobs, stomach, hips, and other such hanging "masses" into unflattering styles and constraining devices that cut off ones circulation in order to look as close to "zero" as possible!

(It is interesting that you always hear those who have cleavage would give it away to be skinny... but you never hear those who don't have cleavage cry, "I would be FAT to have boobs!")

Okay...I've said my peace...

Have you seen the movie, "In Her Shoes" with Cameron Diaz and Toni Collette? There is a dialouge between the two characters (Cameron's is skinny, attractive, and a looser/mooch/party-girl, and Toni's is her sister, a plain/dull but successful attorney who always bails her out, who has a closet FULL of shoes that she never wears.) When asked why she buys these gorgeous accessories, she answers (para-phrasing), "They make me feel good... I'm too fat to enjoy clothes shopping...But I never found a shoe that didn't fit!"

Another reason why shoes are so THERAPUTIC!!


"Our House...In the Middle of Our Street..."

My husband was in a car wreck on Thursday...No...He wasn't hurt...But needless to say, our beater, piece of crap car (owned out-right, thank you!) was folded like a fortune cookie! Since my husband commutes to work everyday, which is an hour away, and since he leaves at 8am and doesn't get home much before 7pm, and since my children have lessons and other things that keep a mother employed as a taxi driver, and the fact that I don't do well with confinement, we decided we needed to get a replacement.

Well...this is all fine and dandy...and my husband is giddy as a teenager in his new 2004 Toyota Camry, in which we got a SLAMMING deal...BUT...this is what it REALLY means:

1) I am stuck in my own private hell of a van for my mortal life.
2) A monthly car payment.
3) We might have to wait a little longer to build a house. (We want to have all our ducks/finances in a row so it will be an exciting next step, instead of having panic attacks about a hasty decision which leaves us penniless!)
4) We will have to stay in our house, in the middle of our street, a little longer.

1) I still have a car, and my freedom.
2) New pair of shoes...Lime-green, slip-on "Pr!vos"...Hey...my husband got a CAR!!
3) I will be able to make sure I have thought of everything for the new house...Even though I'm pretty sure I have a good grip on exactly what I want...
4) We will have to stay in "Our House, in the Middle of Our Street..."

"Father wears his Sunday best
Mother's tired she needs a rest
The kids are playing up downstairs
Sister's sighing in her sleep
Brother's got a date to keep
He can't hang around

Our house it has a crowd
There's always something happening
And it's usually quite loud
Our mum, she's so house-proud
Nothing ever slows her down
And a mess is not allowed

Father gets up late for work
Mother has to iron his shirt
Then she sends the kids to school
Sees them off with a small kiss
She's the one they're going to miss
In lots of ways

I remember way back then when everything was true and when
We would have such a very good time
Such a fine time, such a happy time
And I remember how we'd play, simply waste the day away
Then we'd say nothing would come
Between us two dreamers

Father wears his Sunday best
Mother's tired she needs a rest
The kids are playing up downstairs
Sister's sighing in her sleep
Brother's got a date to keep, he can't hang around

Our house, in the middle of our street
Our house, in the middle of our street
Our house, in the middle of our street
Our house, in the middle of our
Our house, was our castle and our keep
Our house, in the middle of our street
Our house, that was where we used to sleep
Our house, in the middle of our street
Our house, in the middle of our street
Our house....

(Madness, "Our House," 1983)

There...I feel much better. ;)


A Time to Be Still

So I've been over-doing things lately...To the point where I have been sick, tired, grouchy, and every other type of adjective you can think of! My sweet husband told me that I needed to take a rest...I needed to "be still."

Ironically, this past Sunday in Relief Society, the lesson was on the hymn "Be Still, My Soul." Do you think the Lord was trying to tell me something?! My husband had given me a blessing prior to this, and in it, it literally listed things that I needed to "let go," so I could "rest" and "be still."

I have not answered phone calls, let my house be (even more than ususal!) beyond a wreck, we have had cereal for dinner, I have tried not to stress about my calling, tried not to be hard on myself for my short-comings, not obsessed over appearances, and have tried to really re-evaluate what is important. In the process, the phrase "be still," has become very endearing to me. Sometimes I feel that I am moving so fast, and trying so hard to do so many things that if I would just "be still," my vision would clear, and the answers I have been searching for begin to bloom before my eyes.

So here is to being, still..."All now mysterious shall be bright at last."

The only shoes worn today will be my white and lime-green Adidas when I go have my "alone time" at the gym!!


The Game of Tag...and I'm "IT!"

Thank you to my new-best-friend, Melissa, for tagging me. Now, for your reading enjoyment (ha ha ha), my answers:

Four Jobs You've Had in Your life:
1) Retail Sales Manager over Womens, Intimate Apparel, Juniors, Shoes, the Children's department, and Menswear...I was who they called in to "fix" departments (and their managers) who were not doing well...The hours were DEMANDING and long on your feet, and you worked EVERY holiday... BUT the insurance was GREAT, and two of my babies were FREE (I'm high risk in pregnancy, so this is remarkable!) and I had PAID MATERNITY LEAVE for 8 weeks on both! After my second child, I resigned!!
2) Park Coordinator at LAGOON Amusement Park...yup...in Farmington, Utah!! I worked my way "up" from a rides operator to one of the "elite" people with a radio, who walked around and told everyone what they should be doing. It was a GREAT experience, (even though you might be thinking "carnie,") it taught me a lot of my people skills, and allowed me to pay for High School stuff, as well as not having to work during my first two years of BYU/College because I could save enough by just working during the summer. And OH THE STORIES I COULD TELL...Scandalous, simply SCANDALOUS!!
3) BYU Museum of Art docent...Too bad the first exhibit when I worked was such a disappointment...They should of got the King Tut exhibit...The Etruscans were neat, but just not rivoting enough for most people!
4) Young Women's Counselor and President...Anyone who tells you it's not a job to have an extra 46 girls in and out of your house, and life, for four years, hasn't a clue!

Four Movies You Watch Over and OVER:
1) (Okay...this is were it is getting slightly freaky the more things I find out about Melissa...) So I Married an Ax Murderer..("Woman..woman..WOOOOOOOMAN!!")
2) The Chronicles of Riddick...Vin Diesel...Over and over and over...
3) Beautiful Mind (He should of won the Oscar for THIS movie, and not Gladiator!)
4) Life is Beautiful (Bitter-sweet!)

Four Places You've Lived:
1) California (Chula Vista,San Francisco,Berkeley, and San Jose.)
2) Colorado (Fort Collins, and Littleton)
3) Washington (Spokane...Probably my favorite place!)
4) Happy Valley, Utah!! (Where I NEVER thought I'd end up!!)

Four TV Shows You Love to Watch:
1) Grey's Anatomy
2) The Apprentice
3) King of Queens
4) Boston Legal

Four Websites You Visit Daily:
1) Wells Fargo...and it's NOT to count the millions!
2) Melissa's blog
3) Wells Fargo...making sure DH gets his paycheck...
4) Melissa's blog
(This is usually done in 2-3 minute spasm's during the day when my 3 year old will actually let me onto the computer for something other than the game "Bumbler")

Four of Your Favorite Foods
1) Sushi (especially crab with cucumber and EEL! YUM!!)
2) Steak from Zetah's at the Gateway in Salt Lake City
3) My friend Michelle's Cheese Soup
4) Salads...All kinds...All types...with a loaf of sourdough bread and BUTTER!

Four Places You'd Rather be Right Now:
1) the Cottage Spa at Gardiner Village
2) Anywhere with a beach
3) An archeological dig in Egypt
4) Silence and a good book

Despite the fact that I have a VERY small group of people who actually read my blog, I will submit a name on the off-chance that she will sometime visit my blog in the near future! I "pick" a real flower to tag...Suzie Petunia! I tag you to go next!!

Todays Shoes: Baby-pink Pumas...one of THE MOST comfortable shoes I have worn (and that's saying A LOT!) and since they are pink, it just makes them that much more fun!